Rosie Dimanno can take it like a man so I don’t have to!

In response to this column in Today’s Toronto Star.

Congratulations, Rosie, on your new set of testicles! If women like you weren’t out there taking it like a man, we would never know the standard to which we must we live up. Sure, taking away all responsibility of men by being careful to never act like a “woman” is not an original way to live your life and subvert feminism, but it was good of you to remind me of the importance of being ashamed of my femininity so as not to be thought a pathetic fool.

I am sure that this column has inspired many angry e-mails from raging feminists determined to drag you to a bra burning. I’d like to offer you a few words of advice, friend to friend, for future columns so you might potentially avoid that issue.

While I certainly do my best to convince people of my point of view by offering up unrelated “evidence”, it is sure to cause you trouble. It appears that your argument is that women should never speak publically about their cheating husbands because it makes them look like fools, and demeans women everywhere. While asserting that women are raised to be tattlers and whingers seems like it would be an effective way to shut these women up, some of your more savvy readers might try to poke holes in your arguments.

One example might be “Hey Rosie, why not trying offering up some reasons why going public is a bad idea instead of resorting to name calling – particularly because girls “are nurtured in the culture of tattle and tell-all grievance from the time they’re subjected to their first schoolyard name-calling”. Or something of the sort. Unless of course your point was that women should never talk about their feelings (men learn that that makes them “pussies” while women are busy tattling), in which case name calling seems like the only reasonable route to take.

Even then, though, you might consider explaining to us why never expressing feelings is actually better than expressing them some or all of the time. Clearly acting like a real man is better (and men acting like “women” is disgraceful), but I need some reassurance. Explain it to me like I’m a woman an idiot.

Another thing to keep in mind is choose your target appropriately. Picking quasi-celebrity women who live their lives in the public eye in this new era of celebrity politics seems like a mistaken choice for an argument against living your life in the public eye. Surely if your neighbour wrote a book about her husband’s affair and went on Oprah as a representative of women everywhere she’d make much better example. But I guess Oprah wouldn’t care much about listening to her.

And finally, be careful not to slip into any womanly talk. For a moment you had me worried. Surely only a feminist would take issue with Elizabeth Edwards blaming the other “bimbo” rather than her husband. Luckily you save yourself when you point out she knows little about men (they cheat so get over yourself) and suggest she is from another planet. Nice touch mentioning that this is extra stupid behaviour for a “trained lawyer”.

I hope that this helps.

Sincerely (or maybe not),

Lizz

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